Break Up and Our Crazy Thoughts

When we have been dumped left, jilted, whatever you want to call it, we start having these crazy thoughts. We rethink it over and over and replay conversations and good and bad times in our heads over and over. This drives us insane. We are our worst enemy in times like these.

One of the biggest fears we have I do believe is he or will he be with someone else. We imagine them in the arms of another woman doing and saying all the things they did and said with us. It eats us alive.

Its the way we as women think, but you have to stop driving youself crazy about something you have absolutely no control over. Do you think he is thinking those thoughts about you? Maybe, maybe not. You have to accept those things that you can't control and work on what you can control, which is you. You are only hurting yourself more by allowing this to consume you. Take control of your thought process and accept that whatever happens just happens. Acceptance is a big part of keeping those thoughts under control.

I went through and even convinced myself that my guy broke up with me and he would have no trouble finding another woman. Then I convinced myself that even if he did, she would not be no where near as wonderful as I am. That is how I learned to deal with those thoughts.

If you do want him back though and you want to decrease the chances of him ending up with someone else, then get on the plan to get back your man.

Broken Hearted and You Want Him Back

You and your guy just broke up and you are feeling desperate. You don't feel like doing anything buy crying. Your heart is broken and you are doing good to get out of the bed in the morning. Every song on the radio just tears at your heartstrings and you could not possibly watch a chick flick. You are playing the break up and the past over and over in your head and driving yourself crazy. What could I have done differently you ask yourself. What can I do to get my man back. How can I get through this?

There are things you can do that will greatly increase your chances for getting your man back. First you need to accept the things that you may be doing or want to do to get him back that could actually drive him further away. If you are calling, showing up at his house and places where he frequents, you need to stop. This just reminds him of why he broke up with you in the first place and it puts too much emotions onto him. Men don't deal with emotions very well, they can't help this. It is just a fact that we as women deal with emotions much better than men. That being said you have to understand that just because the emotional appeal would work for you as a woman, it will not work for a man. You want to do what works for them.

I read in the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus that men are like rubber bands. Now when you think about this, it really is true. They will stretch out and then spring back. With a man if you want him to spring back, you have got to allow him to stretch out. They need this time to stretch as this is when they start to really sort through things and this is when they will miss you. If you are constantly in their space, this process will not happen. Give him his space. This is the first step to get your man back.

Don't contact him. This is the hard part, but men do not respond to all of those words you are pushing at them. They do respond to distance though. Distance works on their imagination. They will wonder, wow, what happened? This woman who was so into me is not calling. What is she doing? Let his imagination fill in the gaps. This will prompt him to contact you. Now please understand this may not happen in a matter of days. It could take weeks and weeks. A man's time table is so different from that of a woman. Its something you have to accept to get through this. It is a fact though that the majority of men will initiate contact eventually after the break up. Its gonna happen if you play it cool. If you want your guy back, let him contact you first.

Once he makes the contact, you have to be ready with a plan. You want him back remember. Do not talk about the break up or the whys or your emotions. Keep it light and be friendly. You want to make this contact positive and you want it to replace the bad memory of the break up. You want to leave him feeling good about you as this will open him up to call or contact again. After he does contact you, do not call him, wait once more. I know you want to talk about your pain and feelings but wait. There will be plenty of time to talk about that once you get him back and into a committed relationship.

Most women when attempting to get their man back do all the wrong things. Do you want to be one of those women? Wouldn't you rather know how a man thinks about a break up and how to appeal to his way of thinking? How much time do you have before he is out and finds someone else? Can you afford to wait? Be the woman who has a plan to bring back her man and lead him to commitment.