Monday, August 1, 2011

Why You Can't Find a Good Man

I know a lot of man haters out there.  I know a lot of women who say they only attract jerks or bad boys.  I often hear women say, but I never feel any chemistry with a nice guy.  A nice guy is not to be confused with a good guy.  The nice guys are the ones who show up at your first coffee date with flowers to impress you.  The nice guys are the ones that start doting on you long before they really know you, trying to fill a position so to speak.  Good guys are just good guys.  They open doors, treat you with respect, call when they say they will, plan in advance and do all the right things, so why oh why can't you feel it for a good guy?

I am going to venture to say that your last relationship or maybe even last few relationships were not all that successful.  Maybe you were with a man who would not commit.  Maybe you felt this great chemistry when you were together, but never knew where you stood otherwise.  Or maybe he cheated on you, or did you wrong but you loved him so much anyway.  They say we can't choose who we love, but I am going to challenge this a bit.

Those men in your past became your normal.  You felt chemistry with these men that did not treat you right, and now you are programed to associate chemistry with the bad boy types.  You meet good men, but you are never attracted to them.  It's because you have been trained like Pavlov's dog that chemistry equals bad treatment.  It's conditioned into you, has become your normal. Think about the longing you have for that wrong man.  He isn't present in your life, yet you associate him with feelings of love and attraction.

Stop Wasting Time on the Wrong Guys.
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You have to break the cycle.  Ever fell in love with a good guy?  It feels pretty nice.  No more wondering if he is going to call or not.  No more wondering if he will do what he says he will do.  No more wondering where you stand because he shows you where you stand with his actions.  No more disappearing many syndrome when you fall in love with a good guy.

Yes we attract all sorts of men into our lives, but you can choose to accept them or toss them back.  We don't attract the wrong men into our lives, we accept the wrong men into our lives.  I know a lot of women think out the roof chemistry is a must.  Yes there is something to say about chemistry, I agree, but examine what your idea of chemistry is based on and understand that it is formed by past experiences to a degree.  We are conditioned by our past.  If what you have done in the past hasn't brought you a man that adores you, it's up to you to change your behavior and attitude.  Good guys rock, they really really do.

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